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Tuesday, May 3, 2011

On Flaccid Decoys And Empty Chambers: A Hunting Story

The calendar says there are five days left in the 2011 wild turkey season in North Carolina, but I'm done and not in the good way.

All the pre-season scouting trips back in March; all the 4:30 a.m. wake-up calls; all the miles trudged up and down those Appalachian foothills have come to naught. I am turkeyless ... again.

Remember that post I wrote two months ago? I do. I boasted, "There in the thick pine stand roosts the tom turkey I intend to kill on opening day." I hedged my bets when I also wrote, "I've been at this game long enough to realize the myriad things that can and probably will go wrong ..." I was mistaken on both counts. I did not kill that tom turkey on opening day, or any other day for that matter, and I had no idea of the colorful new ways this season I'd find to screw up a turkey hunt.

I'll spare you the descriptive minutia of every trip I made into the woods; the dozen or so times I worked gobblers that responded to my calls and, for whatever reason, did not commit. I'll just tell you about these:

April 13 - Opening Week
A close encounter with two toms a couple of days prior had me thinking I could set up above the roost, set out a decoy on an old logging road and patiently wait out the bird that would finally break my 3-year slump. I climbed three quarters of the way up the hill, found a clearing in the thick pines and unrolled my inflatable hen turkey decoy.

After I made myself comfortable, I put out a series of yelps with my trusty box call and waited. Ten minutes later, I threw out another sequence and one of the toms down the hill responded, starting a game of Marco Polo that went on for the next half hour or so, with me trying to convince him to come up the hill and him trying to convince me to come down. Finally, the gobbler went quiet and I got ready. A responsive tom turkey that suddenly stops gobbling usually means one of two things; either a real hen has come to the party and taken him away, or he's on the move and closing the distance.

It was the latter. After five minutes or so, the tom gobbled just downhill from me. He was searching for that hen who was playing hard to get. I shouldered my shotgun and pointed it in the opening I thought he'd appear. The gobbler fired off again, a little to the left and facing away. A minute later, he gobbled again, further to the left and further away. Reluctantly, I lowered the gun and picked up my box call. I stroked out some soft, sweet yelps and he cut me off with a thunderous gobble. He was coming in hot.

A minute later, I spotted him coming over the rise, right where I expected him to. He stopped for a second, picked up his head and saw the decoy for the first time. He was 25 yards away. I could have shot him right there, but I held off as he went into a half-strut and gobbled again at the decoy. This was game and set. He'd seen the decoy and was moving into position to find some room to do some strutting. I followed him with the bead at the end of the barrel as he orbited the decoy. I was going to let him walk right up on it and then I was going to clobber him.

Little did I know ...

The old tom circled 90 degrees around the decoy, never stopping or presenting a shot. When he got downhill of my itchy trigger finger, he made an unexpected left turn and kept on going down the slope, never to be seen or heard from again. What the ...?

The headless decoy.
I waited a little while, then called a bit, then called a little louder, and then louder still. He was gone alright.

I looked around my ambush. Something spooked him. Was my white tube sock showing above my boot? Had my roll of orange flagging tape (I never go hunting without it) fallen out of my pocket? Nope. I was clean. I stood up and looked down the hill. Wait a minute, the decoy didn't look right. I walked over to my inflatable turkey sex toy and realized the valve had come open and deflated any chance I had of killing that bird. Foiled by a flaccid decoy.

April 28 - Week 3, in the company of the Florida Cracker Contingent
I was excited to host three of my great hunting buddies from the state of Florida, who, over the last four years, have given up their expertise and access to vast orange groves outside Tampa to me and several of my North Carolina compadres to hunt wild pigs. Shooting hogs isn't terribly exciting for them, but they do love to hunt turkeys and I was thrilled by the opportunity to repay their generosity.

We split into two teams. Stephen and I started midway up a ridge and heard a distant gobbler above us right before 7 o'clock. We worked that bird for an hour, but I'm not sure it ever even heard me calling to it. Eventually, the tom went quiet and we made a big move to the top of a ridge at the head of the valley.

Plenty of scratching here. Let's give it a try.
Stephen and I expected to hear something once we got to the top, but it was all quiet. We didn't want to give up after busting our tails in climbing the ridge, so we walked along, looking for a spot to sit and call. There was plenty of turkey scratching up there, so we decided to sit 30 yards apart on either side of the ridge and do a little calling.

I had my back against a fallen log and a great view of the slope below. The only way a turkey was going to sneak up on me was if it came in from behind or slipped in from above on the opposite side of the ridge. That would be fine because that was where Stephen was sitting. I got to calling every five minutes or so, but to be honest, I was doing as much basking in the Carolina sunshine as I was paying attention to the woods around me. Every once in awhile Stephen would call with his slate. He sounded great. Life was good. Maybe I could just close my eyes a little bit and take a nap.

I must have moved my head a little bit right before I heard that all too familiar alarm putt of a male turkey at close range. My eyes snapped open and I spotted a jake on full alert, on the ridge above me, just 20 yards away. He'd busted me but he wasn't quite sure what he should do about it. As he started fast-walking across my area of influence, I brought up the shotgun and followed his head. If he stopped, it was going to be all over. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I spied another bird, closer, standing stock still behind a large pine. He hadn't seen me yet for the tree between us, so I swung over to him and waited. A moment later, the second jake stepped out into the open. It was a 15-yard shot. I admired his feathers, all bronzy and green in the sunshine, his stubby little beard sticking out of the middle of his chest, his vibrant red head, and I squeezed the trigger. The long wait was finally over. Click. The turkey looked at me and started running down the hill after his partner, then they both took off and sailed down the valley.

I looked at my gun in disbelief, and then the wave of dread washed over me. I worked the pump and opened the chamber - no shells. I slipped my hand into my right pants pocket and felt the three rounds that were supposed to be in my gun. Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. I didn't do that did I?

There are many sins in the woods. Not loading one's gun before the hunt is perhaps the stupidest and most inexcusable and I now count myself among those unfortunate fools who have committed it.

Yes folks, it's been a long season. I didn't get my turkey, but I certainly made things happen. I am sated and take comfort in the knowledge those birds will be there next spring, a little older, a little wiser, and I can only hope that I will be too.

7 comments:

  1. It has been a very long season. No birds here either!

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  2. Awesome, Jamie! Great, albeit very sad, tale!

    Wild animals will always find a way to make the hunter look the fool. Of all of them, the turkey has got to be worst.

    But at least you got out and got after them! Count your blessings.

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  3. Trey - I read your post on the subject and I feel your pain. I'm afraid I seem to be on a four year plan.
    Phillip - You're right about that. I'd rather have the stories to tell than have sat on the couch. It wouldn't be fun if it was easy.

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  4. We had no luck either... season ends this week and we're pretty much done. DU swore there were spots that we'd get something but we were just privy to see a lot of turkey butts running away from us.

    Sad but part of the game, good luck next season!

    HLYH

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  5. HLYH - turkey alarm putts and fading butts, the story of our season.

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  6. From a friend on New River Smallies forum. His first cousin just completed taking a turkey in every state that has them. That would be 49 states, all except Alaska. I hope the amount of space this takes up doesn't screw things up.

    Eastern Typical by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    1 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 28.8750 Apr 25, 2008
    SUSSEX, DE, USA

    Eastern Typical taken with a Modern Firearm by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    404 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 69.7500 Apr 21, 2010
    PIKE, IN, USA
    451 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 68.3750 Apr 22, 2007
    MARSHALL, WV, USA
    454 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 68.2500 May 15, 2009
    MONROE, WI, USA
    463 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 68.0000 Apr 18, 2011
    CLAIRBORNE, TN, USA
    492 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 67.2500 Apr 22, 2007
    JEFFERSON, OH, USA
    511 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 66.5000 Apr 29, 2006
    BUREAU, IL, USA
    565 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 64.8750 May 8, 2005
    SHELBY, MO, USA
    608 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 63.6250 Mar 16, 2006
    MONTGOMERY, MS, USA
    625 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 63.0000 Apr 3, 2004
    RUSSELL, AL, USA
    693 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 60.6250 May 6, 2003
    WARREN, NJ, USA
    713 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 60.0000 Apr 16, 2005
    PULASKI, VA, USA
    713 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 60.0000 Mar 24, 2008
    MADISON, LA, USA
    756 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 58.5000 May 12, 2003
    NEW LONDON, CT, USA
    786 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 57.2500 Mar 20, 2010
    EARLY, GA, USA
    790 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 57.1250 May 3, 2007
    PERSHING, NV, USA
    818 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 56.1875 Oct 24, 2008
    SIOUX, ND, USA
    823 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 56.0000 May 6, 2010
    GRAFTON, NH, USA
    835 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 55.5000 Apr 17, 2009
    STOKES, NC, USA
    844 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 55.0000 Apr 27, 2011
    GARRETT, MD, USA
    856 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 54.2500 Apr 14, 2008
    LYON, KY, USA
    897 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 52.0000 May 7, 2010
    ORANGE, VT, USA
    936 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 50.0000 May 27, 2009
    HURON, MI, USA
    954 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 48.5000 Apr 26, 2010
    GREAT BARRINGTON, MA, USA
    971 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 47.2500 Apr 30, 2007
    CACHE, UT, USA
    1005 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 43.5000 Oct 27, 2005
    CLARK, AR, USA
    1009 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 42.2500 Apr 16, 2002
    PULASKI, VA, USA
    1032 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 38.8750 Apr 2, 2004
    RUSSELL, AL, USA
    1047 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 36.6250 Mar 26, 2011
    ORANGEBURG, SC, USA
    1050 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 36.4375 May 2, 2011
    WALDO, ME, USA
    1063 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 34.5000 May 6, 2011
    WASHINGTON, RI, USA
    1202 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 14.0000 Dec 29, 1998
    PULASKI, VA, USA
    1202 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 14.0000 Nov 23, 2005
    SIOUX, ND, USA
    1202 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 14.0000 Nov 3, 2004
    TIOGA, PA, USA
    1206 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 12.0000 Oct 31, 2004
    CHENANGO, NY, USA
    1206 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 12.0000 Oct 11, 2010
    HUSTON, MN, USA

    Apparently it is going to take two posts.

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  7. Eastern Typical taken with a Muzzleloader by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    54 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 60.2500 May 1, 2005
    WAYNE, IA, USA

    Florida Typical taken with a Modern Firearm by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    413 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 53.7500 Mar 16, 2002
    OSCEOLA, FL, USA
    555 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 38.3750 Mar 27, 1997
    DUNDEE, FL, USA

    Gould's Typical taken with a Modern Firearm by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    42 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 64.5000 Apr 17, 2000
    YECORA, SN, MEX
    194 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 52.1250 Apr 17, 2000
    YECORA, SN, MEX
    332 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 38.2500 Mar 30, 2001
    YECORA, SN, MEX
    360 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 29.3125 Apr 1, 2001
    YECORA, SN, MEX

    Merriam's Typical taken with a Modern Firearm by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    185 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 61.2500 Mar 29, 2005
    SONTA CLARA, CA, USA
    216 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 59.6250 Apr 22, 2002
    NE, USA
    266 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 57.0000 Apr 19, 2006
    STEVENS, WA, USA
    275 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 56.5000 Apr 25, 1998
    CAPULIN, NM, USA
    331 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 53.6250 Apr 25, 1998
    LARIMER, CO, USA
    379 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 51.0000 Apr 24, 2005
    LEWIS, ID, USA
    525 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 41.5000 Apr 17, 2004
    POWDER RIVER, MT, USA

    Ocellated Typical taken with a Modern Firearm by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    154 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 39.7500 Apr 5, 2001
    CONCEPCION, CM, MEX

    Rio Grande Typical taken with a Modern Firearm by Total Score
    Rank Hunter's Name Total
    Score Harvested
    100 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 70.0000 Apr 22, 2006
    DOUGLAS, OR, USA
    241 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 63.0000 Apr 5, 2003
    circle jerk, USA
    274 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 61.2500 Apr 3, 1999
    MCCULLOCH, circle jerk, USA
    360 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 57.2500 Apr 30, 2002
    WILSON, KS, USA
    368 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 56.7500 Aug 6, 2004
    KONA, HI, USA
    427 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 53.7500 Mar 6, 2004
    KONA, HI, USA
    468 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 51.2500 Apr 9, 2005
    CROOK, WY, USA
    491 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 49.5625 Apr 29, 2008
    APACHE, AZ, USA
    534 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 45.1875 Apr 10, 2006
    LOVE, OK, USA
    535 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 45.0000 Apr 9, 2005
    LAWRENCE, SD, USA
    536 H. DANIEL RORRER
    VA ( details) 44.7500 Mar 6, 2004
    KONA, HI, USA

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